Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Peace of mind

Itulah yang di idam2kan oleh semua.. but its so frigging elusive!!

When you think you finally have it all together, wham, something happens and you're back to being a cork in the bathtub. eh no, tak cukup turbulence.. cork in a flooded storm drain.

Busy work schedules, datelines, the many demands & expectations.. all play a part in stressing us out. mana ada peace of mind kalau terkejar sana terkejar sini, nak buat tu nak buat ni. in the end takde satu pun yang betul2 beres kan? but it's not so much about the 'busy-ness' of our lives sebenarnya. i have seen people who remain calm & serene although surrounded by chaos & mayhem.

So what is it then? what gives us peace of mind?

Susah la nak jawab sebab selalunya kita akan kaitkan dengan whats important to us. when the important things are ok, we're ok and so we are at peace. and its different things for different people so it can be rather subjective. but for most of us its having a loving family, a good job, a healthy body, a happy life.

Of course the ultimate peace of mind is the inner peace of the chosen few but thats taking it to another level altogether (ya Allah jadikan lah aku diantara mereka yang soleh & beriman). suffice to say many of us are still struggling to achieve even some semblance of peace.

A couple of nites ago an anak buah called me for a pow-wow. i was actually half expecting to hear from him bcos the family grapevine had long been a-buzz with the problems plaguing his family. i've been keeping mum about it bcos i know from experience that advice is useless unless people ask for it. only then will they be receptive to ideas & opinion.

The poor guy is beyond serabut. everyone in his family seem to be having issues and its all coming together to make his life a living hell. member pulak baru je kawin so nak la some peace & quiet.

To start with his elder brother is going through a very bad patch, both at work & at home. the family business is going to the dogs and the bro's marriage has reached the point of 'retak menanti belah'. unfortunately, instead of facing the music & coming up with a new game plan, he has taken the easy way out by seeking a temporary diversion.. one in the form of a soft pliable body & flaming red lips.

Aduhai, thats almost as good as taking a gun to his head!!

Now everything is exploding around him.. the wife's anger, the parent's despair, the bro's disappointment, the sister's bewilderment.

To add to the chaos, his mom hasnt been home, except for change of clothing & other necessities, for quite sometime now. a few months ago she lost a beloved sister to an unexpected illness and since she belongs to a very close-knit family, they're still gathered together to mourn the sister's passing. unfortunately, his mom's prolong absence is making them feel rather abandoned, especially his dad who is now left to face the mounting problems alone.

And they too have a daughter.. anak bongsu perempuan tunggal, just like AH. and also like AH, she will be sitting for her spm next week. sadly, in all of this madness, nobody seem to give a rats ass about it.

Except this 2nd brother, the one who's worried sick about his family, who actually admits theres not much he can do bcos he's been unjustly accused of wanting to 'bolot semua harta abah' by his desperado of a brother, the one who keeps running away to that soft pliable body. and who's spoiling for a fight.

Abel & Cain.


"Aunty what to do?"


Susah.. its so complicated, i dont even know where to start.

But what i do know is, abang tetap abang. avoid being confrontational. if he has refused your help, just leave him be, let him settle his own mess. have a word with your mom but be very gentle with her when you remind her where her duty lies. rescue your little sister & spare her some love & attention, she'll need all the support she can get in the weeks to come. be there for your dad so that he knows he can depend on you when he needs to.

Perbanyakan doa and have faith that everything happens for a reason and that only HE knows whats best for each one of us.

Semoga terlerai segala kekusutan. insyallah the day will come when you will have peace of mind.


pakmat said...

..relax, justi..out of chaos comes order..experience has taught me that when it comes to ILs and relatives, it is best to let things be..its always better to listen and not to comment..words have a nasty habit of coming back..and a polgamiser will never listen to reason.., take care..

Justiffa said...

Ha ah pakmat, i do agree that we shouldnt be too involved in matters relating to ILs & relatives. but in my case with the hubs away most of the time, i do need to rely on my BILs especially when it comes to emergencies. and we're actually quite clse, so susah la skit.

I just hope its going to be ok soon, sian diorang.

Doakan? and tq :)