I'm an emotional wreck these days. tersangat la sen-ti-men-tal.. skit2 je berair mata, another level up meleleh air hidung plak lol. and sometimes over the most inconsequential things.
Unstable hormones most certainly. i'm not at the pre-menopausal stage for nothing you know lol.
But its also the sad, melancholic feeling that life is passing me by. i hit 49 last month which means its just one more year before the big five-o. fifty, separuh abad.. theres something very resolute about the sound of that!!
Although some would say that its just numbers, its also indicative of how fast the sand in my hour-glass is falling. life has a way of moving relentlessly ahead doesnt it but thats ok, i personally am looking forward to the next phase. a phase where i can sit back, let go of some of the burden that i've been carrying & just focus on growing old, hopefully as gracefully as i can.
Aaah, and to be able to share the twilight years with the one you love!! but life has taught me that nothing is a given and i do realise that it might not actually be an aspiration shared by my partner. he might not be as ready to embrace all the changes that growing old is stringing along in its wake. its not that easy to stare mid-life squarely in the face.
Grey hair? what grey hair?
The one behind your ears la darling ekekekeh ;p
But whatever it is, i choose to bersangka baik. its much easier on the soul that way lol.
And theres still a lot of stuff on my wishlist.. my pilgrimage, travelling the globe, being a granny, trying out a ferrari hehehe. and that means i need to keep myself as fit & healthy as possible. semoga Kau panjangkan umur ku dalam iman & taqwa ya Rabb.
p.s. errr juney & azza, you people still game on turning me into a marathoner by end of 2011? ;D